Let’s just say that spring makes me nostalgic. And spring nights make me nostalgic for the period in my life in which I was doing the most wonderful, frightening thing I have ever done…falling in love. There’s just something about the way the leaves sound at night, the way the grass feels on your feet, the way everything is so still and dark, the way the ground smells sweet and kind of sad after it rains. If I close my eyes for a second, I am seventeen all over again and I am full of blushing-crimson-heart pounding-achy-secret smiles and I don’t know where to even BEGIN to store all the happiness in my heart. I just remember sitting on the front steps at nine o’clock at night and thinking, No one has ever felt as terrible and wonderful as I feel right now.
Tonight feels like that.
What about you? What reminds you of falling in love?
- Use empowering language. People who have been harassed, abused, stalked, and/or assaulted are not just victims of a crime. They are survivors because they lived through it. The term survivor shows respect for their strength and their journey of recovery.
- Educate yourself about the statistics. 1 in 4 women and 1 in 6 men will be sexually assaulted at least once in their lifetimes. 85% of survivors know their attacker. Only 33% of rapes are reported. While anyone can be assaulted, some more vulnerable groups are at a higher risk, statistically. These groups include people with disabilities, the homeless, senior adults, children, and the GLBT community.
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- Be sensitive to humor/language that encourages or excuses sexual violence. The words “rape” and “molestation” get thrown around a lot in some inappropriate contexts –ex: “I just got raped on my tax refund this year.” Comedians and adult cartoons often make jokes at the expense of marginalized groups. This is not funny or edgy or subversive. It’s gross. I hear this a lot:“It’s just a joke. Don’t be so sensitive.” These comments trivialize the genuine pain that women and men who are assaulted experience.
- Go public. Not all of us speak in front of large groups or command a great deal of attention. But we all have public outlets. Social media like Facebook, Twitter, YouTube, email, even our blogs…Some people like to put bumper stickers on their car. Most of us wear jewelry or t-shirts. Find a way, big or small, to let your public know where you stand on sexual violence.
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There are tons of local and national organizations that desperately need resources to continue doing what they do. These organizations provide 24-hour hotlines, hospital advocacy, counseling and support groups, community/school education and prevention, and much more! Government funding of these programs is constantly being cut and many crisis centers are fighting to keep their doors open and their staff paid. Most centers accept online donations (which are tax-deductible). Donate locally or visit RAINN (Rape, Abuse & Incest National Network) to donate to what Worth Magazine deems one of “America’s 100 Best Charities.”
You can also buy great gifts for friends and family that support RAINN by clicking HERE.
And they don’t just need money! Contact your local domestic violence shelter or rape crisis center to find about donating things like:
- Old cell phones that can be converted into emergency phones. These phones will only dial 9-1-1 and the survivor or at-risk person will not be charged any fee.
- Gently-used clothing/bedding – many shelters have beds for survivors of abuse but are running out of things like pillows and blankets.
- Hygiene products like shampoo, toothpaste, new underwear and socks – in hospital situations, survivors are often asked to give up their clothing as part of evidence collection.
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