As my first year in the PhD
program looms, I can feel my anxiety building. It’s like someone has
planted a bomb in my heart
and it’s just sitting there in my chest, squeezing and ticking away. I’ve
been having some actual panic
attacks lately (something I haven’t had in a long time). If you’ve never
experienced a panic attack,
it feels like your chest is getting tighter and tighter, like all the air has
gone
out of the room. And this is
why Kyle is my hero, for sitting through these with me, for holding my
hand, for breathing with me,
for helping me to focus long enough to get out of the loop.
If life is like
walking a
tightrope in a circus,
the crowd below just waiting for me to fall, then being
married
to Kyle
is like the safety
net below me.
It’s the difference between falling and going SPLAT
and
falling
and being caught.
After
almost seven years together,
thank you, Kyle, for still catching me, for not
letting me go SPLAT.
What about you? What has your relationship done or been for YOU?
love, elizabeth
PS: Check back soon for pictures from my office makeover! I’m pretty stoked.
