Thursday, November 22, 2012
Kyle and I have spent the whole day together, just the two of us. That’s my favorite part about Thanksgiving – the two of us and the puppy snuggled up in our apartment every year, cooking and watching movies and making up holiday-themed dance routines in the kitchen and wrestling the giblets from the still-partially frozen turkey and arguing over whether Scrooged or White Christmas is the better Christmas movie.
It’s been a great day but you know what really clinched it for me? Finally sitting down at our tiny kitchen table and listening to Kyle talk about growing up in Steamboat Springs, watching his eyes close as he describes the layout of his childhood home on 7th Street, watching him smile as he explained how he and his little brother Aaron would help decorate for Christmas. I couldn’t tear my eyes away from his face and I just kept thinking, “There is still so much I want to know about you. There is still so much to find out.”
On our eighth Thanksgiving, I keep imagining the next year and the next and the next. I have no idea what they will look like. Will they be like this one? Will there be a tiny new person soon? Will there be another house, another home? Another job? Another city? The future seems like an impossible, overwhelming unknown.
And then I hear Kyle’s prayer over dinner echoing in my ears: “Thank you for Elizabeth, thank you, God, for being the one who holds us together after all this time. We know that’s because of you. In Your name, Amen.”
Monday, November 19, 2012
You heard me right. My candidacy exam is OVER. 18 hours, 42 pages, $87 in library fines, and an unholy amount of coffee later and I am DONE.
I am too tired to say much of anything about it except that actually sitting down and writing was pretty fun. And that feeling when I was finally done, when I had turned it all in…it seriously felt like I had wrestled an alligator or something.
My oral defense is next week so I’m not out of the woods yet BUT it’s out of my hands and I’m glad for that. (Don’t let this bravado fool you…I’m nervous about that, too!)
After almost six months of preparing for this exam, I am suddenly done with it. Crazy town. And I’m so excited for Thanksgiving break! I have some super fun Christmas projects I’ve been dying to get to and BLOGGING! You guys, I can blog again!!!
Thank you to everyone for all of their sweet encouragement, especially this last month. It really got me through.
I know it’s only November 19th but I wanted to give you a head start on shopping by offering some options. And if my husband happens to see this…well, that’s just a crazy coincidence.
This book looks really funny and interesting. Reviewers have called it “investigative satire” and Jon Ronson spends time with the craziest, real-life people – like Phoenix, the masked superhero. I need to read this
Option 2: A coupon for a date with my husband to Wickliff Books on High Street (you’ll have to coordinate this with him, obviously, Santa).
Option 3: C.O. Bigelow Rose Salve (available at Bath & Body Works).
Option 5: Sparkly hair pins (not barrettes - there’s a subtle difference which I’m sure you will understand).
Option 6: One thousand kisses (not from you, from Kyle – way to make it awkward, Santa.)
If you think I’m being greedy…I am.
love and (sort of almost-ish) Merry Christmas,
Monday, November 12, 2012
Now if you'll excuse me...I need to go quietly vomit somewhere.
Saturday, November 10, 2012
I just want him to know that I am so proud of him. I’m proud of his kindness and his sense of humor, of his gentleness, his self-deprecating manner and deep humility. Mostly, I’m proud that he’s mine.
Happy birthday to the sexiest, funniest, sweetest guy a girl could ever marry.
Tuesday, November 6, 2012
So does Sarah. In fact, she likes scarves so much she invested an entire post on it. An she has a special guest star modeling some of her favorite accessories. It’s one of my favorite things on the blogs today and I think you will like it. Go visit!
If you’re one of the eight humans in the United States of America who has not been notified, today is the day that we will elect the president. You should probably vote. Unless you’re a felon. Or a small child. You will not be allowed to vote if you are a small child. I don’t know why there haven’t been more ads informing you about this.
Monday, November 5, 2012
I just wanted to take a minute to say ‘thank you’ to all the wonderful people who read this blog. Thank you for all the support and the comments and notes. Every single one of you is important to me and I value your time and thoughtfulness.
I have not been able to reciprocate and visit all the incredible blogs you write. My candidacy exams are on November 15th, 16th, and 19th and my defense is the 27th and when all of that is done…I will be making it my mission to visit your blogs and catch up on all I’ve been missing (I’m really, really looking forward to that).
Until then, I’ll be doing a lot of this.
Studying, not eating donuts. ….
1. Leslie Knope from Parks and Recreation
"Ma'am, next time we speak...we shall be dancing on the grave of a possum.”
"You're like a man-genius with a taut, narrow frame, like a sexy elf king."
2. Dinah Laurel Lance from Arrow.
Pros of being friends with Laurel Lance: She’s a lawyer so if you ever get in legal trouble, she’d be handy. Also, she’s politically active and cares about the disenfranchised so she would motivate you to stay true to your personal convictions and remind you of who you really are. Plus, she has really cute clothes.
Cons of being friends with Laurel Lance: I feel like hanging around Laurel would probably increase your chances of being kidnapped by a corrupt kingpin and held for ransom or dangled off a building or something.
3. Jessica Day from New Girl
Favorite quotes: “I mean you're like aging ballerina, child chess prodigy, professional magician crazy.”
“I like moving slow. I like being weird and taking my time. I'm not like you. I don't just jump in the potato sack with the first potato that I meet with diabetes!”
4. Olivia Benson from Law and Order: SVU
Favorite quotes: “You did the one thing you're supposed to do when somebody threatens you; survive.”
Fin: “Who's side are you on?”
Benson: “The victim's. Which is where we should be.”
5. Rayna James from Nashville
Pros: Famous and talented. Older than me and would probably give great advice, especially about things I’ll probably be dealing with in the next few years, like motherhood. Good taste in music.
Cons: Busy, has a lot of political problems, is really stressed out, complicated past with ex-boyfriend/bandmate.
What about you? What television character would you totally be friends with?
Friday, November 2, 2012
I am holding out. I WILL HOLD OUT. I WILL NOT CAVE. No matter how much I want to listen to Jimmy Eat World’s “Last Christmas,” I will not, not, NOT DO IT.
Why? Because it is November 2nd and that is not okay. If I start listening to Christmas music now, it won’t be special in December. UGHHHHHHHHHHHHHH…
I vow that I will not listen to Christmas music until November 20th. You guys, that is so far away. You need to hold me accountable, okay?
I thought you might like to see the catchy playlist I made to tide me over until then.
So what would you add to my playlist? What song do you have on repeat right now?
Thursday, November 1, 2012
A couple of weeks ago, I was walking across the street when I was almost struck by a car. I don’t mean in the funny haha exaggerating kind of way that I normally blog. I was seriously almost hit by a car. It was less than a foot from my femur when I heard the brakes squeal and I looked up at two blank-faced individuals who had been, up until that moment, speeding through campus and now looked right at me like I might be one of those Looney Toon-style mirages that Daffy Duck is always seeing in the middle of deserts. Part of me thought I should let it slide. After all, they didn’t hit me. They weren’t the first drivers to ignore a crosswalk. Who hasn’t made a mistake like that? Another, bigger, louder part of me did not agree. Guess who won.
“There is a crosswalk here!” I shouted, gesturing dramatically at the boldly white painted lines beneath my feet. I stood there in the middle of the road for another 5-8 seconds, giving the most serious death-glare I could manage at the driver who was now staring with fascination at his steering wheel, his glove compartment, and rearview mirror. Slightly ruffled but with as much quiet dignity as I could muster, I walked deliberately the rest of the way across, thinking maybe I had overreacted. Maybe.
But here’s the thing. I’m not sure I did.
One of the things I have been recently realizing is that I let all kinds of things slide. I think that’s actually probably a pretty good thing. Pick your battles, says my mom/your mom/every mom ever. They’re right. There’s no point in getting your back up about every little thing that happens.
But I’ve noticed that lately I’d been letting things slide because I have somehow felt that I didn’t have the right to say that I didn’t like what was going on. I didn’t like feeling bullied or attacked every time I posted a status on Facebook, for example. Side note: I can’t be the only person who’s noticed that Facebook seems to have become the breeding ground for the unsolicited argument. If I posted that the sky was blue, three people would observe that I didn’t mention how fluffy the clouds were, two would berate me for not also commenting on smog levels, and one person would just flat out disagree (“Actually, Elizabeth, the sky is more of a cerulean depending upon the time of day and your relative latitude/longitude. Here’s a link to an article: www.iamrightyouarewrong.website.net”). And all I had set out to do was say that the sky was blue. When did Facebook stop being a place to stalk your ex-boyfriend, untag yourself in hideous college pictures, and start becoming a place where the mere presence of a Facebook status requires some seal of approval or systematic vetting/debunking by any and every person you have ever friended online? It’s not that I can’t debate well. I can hold my own. But that’s not why I’ve kept my Facebook account for this long. I started to notice how angry and tense just logging in was making me. I had, seemingly, four choices: 1) Argue back. 2) Let it slide. 3) Unfriend a lot of people/delete my account. 4) Just say directly what I had been really wanting to say. I noticed that I was letting a lot of people run right over the crosswalk. Facebook was starting to feel like a bizarre warzone which I kept willingly entering, hoping no one would engage me in battle. It’s a horrible feeling.
So I went with 4. I decided to just go ahead and SAY exactly how I wanted to be treated. Do you want to see what I said?
I hate passive aggressive FB statuses as much as the next girl so I'm going to be as straightforward about this as possible. I am only keeping my Facebook account to stay in touch with my favorite people, the people I love, love, LOVE, to see the pictures of their cute babies and celebrate their many joys and life successes. I'm not interested in having one more political/ideological//intellectual debate via Facebook. Have something you need to say to me? Get on a plane and come see me. Call me on the phone. Skype me. You might disagree with me. "That's not fair, Elizabeth. You can't post things if you don't want people to respond to them honestly!" Guess what? I don't care. Don't like it? Unfriend me. Bam.
Do I always get it right? Am I always one hundred percent fair when it comes to my online or real-life interactions? Heck, no. Somehow, though, this little thing – this calling a crosswalk a crosswalk – makes me feel more emotionally safe. I feel like I have taken charge of creating some safe space for myself in a world that is not always so safe.
What about you? Do you have a crosswalk you need to call a crosswalk?