Day 10…Instead of talking about embarrassing moments, of which I have many, I thought today I would talk about the person in my life who lives without embarrassment. Madigan. My dog.
Madigan doesn’t know how to be embarrassed.
“Hey Mom, I got scared and peed on the bed. #notembarassed”
“I like to drink water really fast like maybe all the water on the planet will suddenly run out and because I like to make you feel guilty for forgetting to refill my water bowl but then I drink so fast that I choke and have to hack up a lung for fifteen minutes. #notembarrassed”
“You guys, I totes ate three chicken wing bones out of the garbage and then took a gigantic dump on your living room carpet because YOLO. #notembarrassed”
“Just farted really loud and woke myself up but I am still pretending it was one of you. #notembarrassed.”
“You were ignoring me when we went to bed last night, so I put my giant furry butt on the pillow right next to your face until you acknowledged me. #notembarrassed.”
Case, in point:
This is Madigan laying on top of a heavy box while Kyle is carrying it across the parking lot. All Kyle said was, “Madigan, are you serious right now?” She did not reply.
People, this is what it looks like to live without shame.
PS: I should probably introduce Madigan to some dogshaming but I have a feeling she would not care. At all.