The Total Catch: The Story of My Husband and the Hot Bartender

I’ll start this post by saying that I have always known my husband is a total catch. But when you’ve been married to a total catch for just short of five years, you get accustomed to the ‘total catchness’ and it’s easy to forget how wonderful he really is.

Leave it up to a total stranger to remind me.

I’ve been laid up on the couch all weekend, trying to fight off a mean, little cold that appeared out of nowhere, leaving Kyle to his own devices. Yesterday, he stopped at a sports bar to order some hot wings (he may be a total catch, as I’ve said before, but cook he does not).

He arrives home sometime later, managing to look embarrassed, surprised, and flustered all at once. He proceeds to tell me about an attractive waitress who tried repeatedly to buy him a shot of whiskey and give him her phone number. He told her how sorry he was, that he was married (he doesn’t wear his wedding ring to work anymore because he hurt his hand), but that he genuinely appreciated the compliment. Embarrassed, she (who is, apparently, not just a waitress but also a law student) apologized profusely and told him how few good-looking nice guys her age came into the bar.

I would probably be more shocked by this story if it were the first time something like this has happened. But Kyle gets this kind of attention a lot – all of which he finds consistently bewildering and flattering. Because, in true ‘total catch’ form, he seriously has no idea that he is. (Of course, if he decides to read this post, he’ll finally realize the truth and become impossible to live with. I’m envisioning the t-shirt he’ll have made with “KYLE = TOTAL CATCH” emblazoned across it. So let’s just keep this between us, okay, guys?")