Blog Every Day in May

Jenni at Story of My Life announced a blogging challenge for the month of May. And because I have been feeling like a total failure as a blogger this year, I am DOING IT.

You should do it, too! You can even follow Jenni’s awesome calendar of prompts for the month! I’m really excited about this…

Get ready…

love, elizabeth

impossible until it’s not

This was in my fortune cookie the other night.

The hard things keep coming, don’t they? Sometimes I stare at the calendar and think, There is no way I will make it to May. There is no way I will make it through next week. I am so quick to jump ahead to all the things in the universe I can’t imagine shouldering right now. If we got a bill for x amount of dollars, I could not pay it. If I had to turn in my dissertation prospectus tomorrow, I wouldn’t be ready. If a giant robot took over Columbus and forced all humans underground, I wouldn’t have enough bottled water to keep us alive.

I am learning to trust. It’s slow but I’m learning. I try to think back to the all the impossible things I’ve done. Passing my candidacy exam felt impossible. It felt huge, insurmountable. But I did it. Step by step. It’s not as if one minute I was a PhD student and the next I was a PhD candidate. It was night after day after night of reading. It was one exam day at a time, one sentence at a time, one question at a time, one book at a time. It was impossible…until the moment it wasn’t.

I am struggling not to leap ahead to the next impossible thing I can’t imagine overcoming. Some days, I feel scared out of my  mind by how much feels impossible. But that is not how we are supposed to live. That is not how I want to live. 

Things are only impossible…until they are not.

love, elizabeth

The No Make-Up Challenge

I really love make-up. I love to wear it. I love putting it on. But I sometimes find myself troubled by how much I need make-up to feel like myself. Sometimes I don’t like the face underneath. I’ve always been envious of those women who seem to have a natural, unmasked beauty, a radiant and organic glow that says “I just woke up so refreshed this morning. I took a bath in a forest stream and some little birds brought me these uber-flattering yoga pants. I moisturize…with apricot nectar and fairy dew drops.”  I’ve been dying to know…Do I have a natural beauty hidden behind the foundation and eyeliner? Where are my little birds and yoga pants? Where is my radiant glow???

So last week, I gave myself a little challenge – just a chance to try to appreciate my skin and my face, unenhanced by cosmetics. I used an exfoliating face scrub from Bath & Body Works, Thayer's Rose Petal Witch Hazel Toner (which I only mention because I recently discovered it through Sarah’s blog and it’s awesome), and the generic substitute for Aveeno Daily Moisturizer. One week, no make-up. I took pictures everyday. No touch-ups or editing. The only change I’ve made to any of these pictures is to use auto-levels to better represent natural light. The challenge was to love the face in the mirror sans make-up.

Day One

Day Two

Day Three

Day Four

Day Five

Day Six

At the end of the week, I can say I’ve made a new peace with my appearance. This face is flawed. It has blemishes and freckles and unevenness. Maybe this face doesn’t have a place in a magazine or in a movie but it is my face, the one God gave me, a face that is half my mom’s and half my dad’s. It is a map of all the places I have been before, it is a signpost along a journey I am continuing to make. I will look back at these pictures and know what it is to have been there. I have found a comfort in that. I kind of like my face.

I still loving wearing makeup. But I think I’m ready to let my own skin shine through a little more.

I want to hear from you. Is wearing make-up an essential part of your routine? What makes you feel most naturally beautiful? What makes you feel confident as you begin a new day?

love, elizabeth