Alright, serious relationship talk. I need to know if I am the only person who does this.
We spent last night with our young marrieds small group from church. And towards the end of the night, the youth pastor started teasing me about the way I constantly interject in Kyle’s stories.
Here’s an example:
Kyle: I grew up in Colorado.
Elizabeth: Steamboat Springs.
Kyle: Yeah, Steamboat Springs. So I like winter sports and stuff.
Elizabeth: He’s been snowboarding for ten years.
Kyle: I used to do a lot more dangerous things…probably gave my mom a heart attack.
Elizabeth: He skateboarded off a roof one time.
Kyle: Yeah, I broke some toes.
Elizabeth: All of his toes.
Kyle: All of my toes.
And while that’s like…hopefully exaggerated slightly, I know I do that.
Here’s the thing – I don’t do it because I want to talk more. I just want people to really know all the cool details of Kyle’s stories. And sometimes…well, sometimes I just think, HE’S TELLING IT WRONG!!
Part of me thinks I should just learn to shut up. Part of me thinks it’s part of our relationship dynamic. I definitely notice that I do it more in situations where I really, really want other people to like Kyle, to think he’s as great as I do (which, in all fairness, is probably impossible). That doesn’t mean it isn’t incredibly annoying. And while Kyle has repeatedly said he doesn’t mind…I’m still pondering my need to control the situation.
So now I want to know…any other spouses or partners out there find it really hard not to want to ‘help’ tell a story? Anyone have the opposite problem? Is YOUR spouse extra ‘helpful’? If you do this in your relationship, where does that motivation come from?